Rules of Acquisition

From Trekipedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search

The first Rules of Acquisition, codifying Ferengi culture for millennia to follow, were written by Grand Nagus Gint.[1] Ferengi children are expected to memorize all 285 rules of acquisition on command,[2] though females were forbidden to do so[3] prior to Grand Nagus Zek's reforms of the 2370s.[Citation needed]

  • 1. Once you have their money, you never give it back.[2]
  • 3. Never spend more for an acquisition than you have to.[4]
  • 6. Never allow family to stand in the way of opportunity.[2]
  • 7. Keep your ears open.[5]
  • 8. Small print leads to large risk.[6]
  • 9. Opportunity plus instinct equals profit.[7]
  • 10. Greed is eternal.[8]
  • 13. Anything worth doing is worth doing for money.[6]
  • 16. A deal is a deal...[9] until a better one comes along.[6]
  • 17. A contract is a contract is a contract. But only between Ferengi.[1]
  • 18. A Ferengi without profit is no Ferengi at all.[10]
  • 19. Satisfaction is not guaranteed.[6]
  • 21. Never place friendship above profit.[3]
  • 22. A wise man can hear profit in the wind.[3]
  • 27. There's nothing more dangerous than an honest businessman.[6]
  • 31. Never make fun of a Ferengi's mother...[11] insult something he cares about instead.[6]
  • 33. It never hurts to suck up to the boss.[3]
  • 34. War is good for business.[12]
  • 35. Peace is good for business.[12]
  • 40. She can touch your lobes, but never your latinum.[6]
  • 41. Profit is its own reward.[6]
  • 44. Never confuse wisdom with luck.[6]
  • 47. Don't trust a man wearing a better suit than your own.[13]
  • 48. The bigger the smile, the sharper the knife.[3]
  • 52. Never ask when you can take.[6]
  • 53. Never trust anybody taller than you.[14]
  • 54. Rate divided by time equals profit.[14]
  • 55. Take joy from profit, and profit from joy.[14]
  • 57. Good customers are rare as latinum. Treasure them.[15]
  • 58. There is no substitute for success.[6]
  • 59. Free advice is seldom cheap.[3]
  • 60. Keep your lies consistent.[6]
  • 62. The riskier the road, the greater the profit.[3]
  • 65. Win or lose, there's always Huyperian beetle snuff.[6]
  • 75. Home is where the heart is... but the stars are made of latinum.[16]
  • 76. Every once in a while, declare peace. It confuses the hell out of your enemies![17]
  • 79. Beware of the Vulcan greed for knowledge.[6]
  • 82. The flimsier the product, the higher the price.[6]
  • 85. Never let the competition know what you're thinking.[6]
  • 89. Ask not what your profits can do for you, but what you can do for your profits.[6]
  • 94. Females and finances don't mix.[6][18]
  • 95. Expand or die.[19]
  • 97. Enough... is never enough.[6]
  • 98. Every man has his price.[20]
  • 99. Trust is the biggest liability of all.[6]
  • 102. Nature decays, but latinum lasts forever.[21]
  • 103. Sleep can interfere with... (ending unknown)[3]
  • 104. Faith moves mountains... of inventory.[6]
  • 106. There is no honor in poverty.[6]
  • 109. Dignity and an empty sack is worth the sack.[13]
  • 111. Treat people in your debt like family... exploit them.[22][23]
  • 112. Never have sex with the boss's sister.[24]
  • 113. Always have sex with the boss.[6]
  • 117. You can't free a fish from water.[6][Notes 1]
  • 121. Everything is for sale, even friendship.[6]
  • 123. Even a blind man can recognize the glow of latinum.[6]
  • 125. You can't make a deal if you're dead.[25]
  • 139. Wives serve, brothers inherit.[26]
  • 141. Only fools pay retail.[6]
  • 144. There's nothing wrong with charity... as long as it ends up in your pocket.[6]
  • 162. Even in the worst times, someone turns a profit.[6]
  • 177. Know your enemies... but do business with them always.[6]
  • 181. Not even dishonesty can tarnish the shine of profit.[6]
  • 189. Let others keep their reputation. You keep their money.[6]
  • 190. Hear all, trust nothing.[27]
  • 192. Never cheat a Klingon... unless you're sure you can get away with it.[6]
  • 194. It's always good business to know about your customers before they walk in your door.[28]
  • 202. The justification for profit is profit.[6]
  • 203. New customers are like razor-toothed gree-worms. They can be succulent, but sometimes they bite back.[29]
  • 211. Employees are the rungs on the ladder of success. Don't hesitate to step on them.[30]
  • 214. Never begin a business negotiation on an empty stomach.[4]
  • 217. You can't free a fish from water.[22][Notes 1]
  • 218. Always know what you're buying.[6]
  • 223. Beware the man who doesn't make time for oo-mox.[6]
  • 229. Latinum lasts longer than lust.[6]
  • 236. You can't buy fate.[6]
  • 239. Never be afraid to mislabel a product.[1]
  • 242. More is good... all is better.[6]
  • 255. A wife is a luxury... a smart accountant a necessity.[6]
  • 261. A wealthy man can afford anything except a conscience.[6]
  • 263. Never allow doubt to tarnish your lust for latinum.[30]
  • 266. When in doubt, lie.[6]
  • 284. Deep down everyone's a Ferengi.[6]
  • 285. No good deed ever goes unpunished.[31][32]
  • Unk. Exploitation begins at home.[Citation needed]

Notes

  1. 1.0 1.1 Rules 117 and 217 are identical. It's unclear if this is due to a publishing error in the book "The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition", or if the rule was misquoted in the episode "Past Tense, Part I". Both iterations have been placed on this list at this time.

References

  1. 1.0 1.1 1.2 "Body Parts". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 497. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 10 June 1996.
  2. 2.0 2.1 2.2 "The Nagus". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 411. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 22 March 1993.
  3. 3.0 3.1 3.2 3.3 3.4 3.5 3.6 3.7 "Rules of Acquisition. Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 427. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 8 November 1993.
  4. 4.0 4.1 "The Maquis, Part I". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 440. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 25 April 1994.
  5. "In the Hands of the Prophets". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 420. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 21 June 1993.
  6. 6.00 6.01 6.02 6.03 6.04 6.05 6.06 6.07 6.08 6.09 6.10 6.11 6.12 6.13 6.14 6.15 6.16 6.17 6.18 6.19 6.20 6.21 6.22 6.23 6.24 6.25 6.26 6.27 6.28 6.29 6.30 6.31 6.32 6.33 6.34 6.35 6.36 6.37 6.38 6.39 6.40 6.41 6.42 "The Ferengi Rules of Acquisition". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. Book. Simon & Schuster/Pocket Books, July 1995.
  7. "The Storyteller". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 414. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 3 May 1993.
  8. "Prophet Motive". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 462. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 20 February 1995.
  9. "Melora". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 426. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 1 November 1993.
  10. "Heart of Stone". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 460. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 6 February 1995.
  11. "The Siege". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 423. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 11 October 1993.
  12. 12.0 12.1 "Destiny". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 461. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 13 February 1995.
  13. 13.0 13.1 "Rivals". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 431. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 3 January 1994.
  14. 14.0 14.1 14.2 "Raise the Dawn". Star Trek: Typhon Pact, Book 7. Novel. Simon & Schuster/Pocket Books, June 2012.
  15. "Armageddon Game". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 433. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 31 January 1994.
  16. "Civil Defense". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 453. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 7 November 1994.
  17. "The Homecoming". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 421. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 27 September 1993.
  18. "Profit and Lace". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 547. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 11 May 1998.
  19. "False Profits". Star Trek: Voyager, Episode 144. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 2 October 1996.
  20. "In the Pale Moonlight". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 543. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 13 April 1998.
  21. "The Jem'Hadar". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 446. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 13 June 1994.
  22. 22.0 22.1 "Past Tense, Part I". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 457. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 2 January 1995.
  23. "The Darkness and the Light". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 509. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 6 January 1997.
  24. "Playing God". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 437. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 28 February 1994.
  25. "The Siege of AR-558". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 558. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 16 November 1998.
  26. "Necessary Evil". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 428. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 15 November 1993.
  27. "Call to Arms". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 524. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 16 June 1997.
  28. "Whispers". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 434. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 7 February 1994.
  29. "Little Green Men". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 480. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 6 November 1995.
  30. 30.0 30.1 "Bar Association. Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 488. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 19 February 1996.
  31. "The Collaborator". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 444. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 23 May 1994.
  32. "The Sound of Her Voice". Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Episode 549. Television. Paramount Pictures Corporation, 8 June 1998.